31 August 2008

Parts And Labor At Market Hotel


I just got back from a show at the Market Hotel, a place that appears to be an abandoned building but is, in actuality, some kind of market or hotel.

The bands: Parts and Labor, Pterodactyl, and some drum group that saw Stomp too many times.

The gimmick: The bands took turns playing songs. Play continued clockwise around the room. This is something Dan Deacon recently dreamed up, so I'm sure they got the idea from Pitchfork. Strike one. One of the other gimmicks was that it was so hot I wanted to shoot myself.

The result: Deafness.

I think it's impossible for me to review this shindig very fairly. It was really impressive when I first got there, what with the excited crowd, the darkness, and the loud noises. This was before I realized that all the hipsters had a personal 40 of OE and that beers there were five bucks. That's, like, half a Hamilton.

Let's get one thing straight. If you're going to hold an overcrowded, understaffed, windowless state-tragedy-waiting-to-happen illegally in the open space above a grocery store whose roof cannot support the thousands of pounds worth of human bodies and expensive electrical equipment weighing down on it, you do not charge five fucking dollars for a beer. Let the Charleston do that.
Nor should you be allowing all three bands to play at the same time to close the show, deafening everyone in the room.

Parts And Labor: a pop punk band posing as a psychedelic rock band. They've got a girl guitarist who, I'm 99% sure, didn't play a note all night. But she was hot so whatever. Dude with the beard was tight-looking. Sweet glasses, man. None of them could play their instruments.

Pterodactyl: a hardcore band posing as Abe Vigoda. At one point, someone screams "You guys suck" as they start their song. They did.

The drum circle: Stomp. The only thing they had going for them was the flashing light, and the dude who screamed into the vocorder had a cowbell. That he didn't know how to play. But whatever, malt liquor makes everything seem interesting.

If I was a nicer person, I would say something like "At least it was entertaining." But I'm not. In all honesty, the next time I hear about anything like this, I'm calling the cops immediately. And not because I care about anyone's safety.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

WOW! You're a huge cocksucker.

Anonymous said...

beer was $3, dude.

plus you could buy your own bottle for $1.50 at the 24 hour korean grocery downstairs and bring it in no problem. what's not to love?

Anonymous said...

I get a distinct vision of the author as another dumb rich suburbanite kid who just moved to town and is about to start freshman year at Columbia.

You get pretty much all your facts wrong and don't know squat about the subject matter.

Basically, you sound like a limpdick internet loser who's never touched a girl.

Anonymous said...

Hey I was at that show and the beer wasn't $5, it was $3 plus you could bring in your own.

get your facts right, fuck up!

and if you seriously start calling the cops on parties like this I will personally kick your ass, and I won't be the only one.

Philip Brightmore said...

Funny, they were $5 when I was there. But I guess two vs. one on this one.

Also, you are not able to kick my ass.